heatheredeffect

🤍 I was able to utilize some energy to film…let’s go! If you..

Added 2024-08-21 20:25:02 +0000 UTC

🤍 I was able to utilize some energy to film…let’s go! If you pray or meditate or talk to spirits (it’s all the same to me), if you could genuinely add me to your prayer list just like — help me work through this blockage that keeps happening with YouTube and help me get clarity on what I’m suppose to be doing. There’s a lot of sexual undertones to my ASMR that I embraced because I was like what’s wrong with adult ASMR? It’s like watching an adult show. Just because it isn’t wholesome made for literal children doesn’t mean it’s bad or not appropriate for YouTube (or so I thought). Their platform is so weird (my channel has been demonetized since April for sexual gratification content) and then it puts me in this place where I start to feel a lot of shame and guilt around my sexuality like there’s something wrong with me somehow because of this. Just giving you some insight into this loop I’ve been living for forever now it seems. I am so DONE hitting my head you know 😂 Hopefully everyone likes wholesome, bone dry unsensual ASMR or better yet something will come to me that will help unite us and entertain us and give us some virtual fun like that’s all I’m trying to do. FML. Everything is so FUCKING SERIOUS blah blah bosses, rules, guidelines, control it’s all so wrong!!! Ugh! I CANT STAND BEING CONTROLLED lol Anyway, thank you for reading my live diary and temper tantrums. Feel free to give me advice or just live diary back to me. Life is just so fucking insane sometimes and there’s so many people around you can’t even scream AHH. I’m about to go scream in a pillow brb. 💗