diary entry: november 2012 - home for thanksgiving You and ..
Added 2023-05-01 22:47:44 +0000 UTCdiary entry: november 2012 - home for thanksgiving
You and Carter fuck on the floor of his living room with the grain of the carpet burning against your back and your nails digging into his hips and it feels like coming home.
Hooking up with Carter has always felt like this because he knows you on a different level, the rawest, the most selfish, the worst of you and still loves you, and vice versa. You dithered back and forth about the decision all night, worried about how you would feel the next morning, about the fucking him, about yourself.
But then you both just- his hair falls across your neck as he groans out say it, 'say it,' and you search your mind for a rational reason why not and so you gasp it out, 'yes I want to I want you to' because you have to after six years of almost and he is fucking you deep and hard and it is so many things and it isn’t so many things but yes, yes, this is what you needed. Before you could have everything you want, you needed this.
You high five after. 'We just had sex,' 'finally,' 'finally.' 'I love you,' 'right back at you.' He is ragged: stubbly and sated and sad, but he grins at you like he did in high school. And you are you again. He built you up again and you are ready now. Your hands smell like herbal cigarettes and the sweet sweat that has always been Carter.
The stars are bright and clear and he puts his arm around your shoulders and calls you kid and you burn strong.
