Ok so i have to be honest with you guys.. I’m kinda struggli..

Ok so i have to be honest with you guys.. I’m kinda struggling right now. My grandma with Alzheimer’s has finally forgotten me and my dad, her son, and the rest of her kids/ incredibly close family. She was originally diagnosed with early set stage Alzheimer’s. We thought we’d have more time before all this. She remembered me at thanksgiving and was doing alright. Now She is at the point she needs 24/7 care. She is not safe alone anymore but she lives alone. My family has been fighting for months about putting her in a home. My aunt tried living with her for a while, a couple months, but grandma was getting physical with my aunt and it was more than she could handle so she moved out and grandma is alone again.
I went to see her the day after Mother’s Day and was able to see for myself how bad it’s really gotten so fast. It’s bad. I took her shopping and let’s just say it was a shit show lol, I cried the whole 2 hour drive home. I’m thankful she was happy the whole time. Her Spirits were high- but She was just completely un aware of pretty much anything happening and was an entire different person. But she was happy.. i am thankful for that. This has subconsciously been bothering me for a while but reality has finally set in when i saw her and boiled over and now we are here. I’ll be okay I’m just sad. I miss the person she was and can’t recognize the person she is now. Nothing anybody can do, i just have to learn how to live with and accept it. I am not asking for sympathy or anything. I just like being transparent with you guys so you’re aware of what’s going on when I’m being distant and not posting or responding as much, or posting about being sad. I will always try my hardest for you guys and I’ll always be honest and open about my life but i hope y’all can respect that my Ohana will always come first no matter what so if i go quiet for a while that’s why. I love you guys so much! And i appreciate you all endlessly. I’m gonna try my best to continue posting the way I’ve been. I’ll try to get back to messages and stuff when i get off work🫶🏼 i hope you’re all having a good Thursday!