Two cows are grazing in a field. One says to the other, “You ever worry about that mad cow disease?”
The other cow says, “Why would I care? I’m a helicopter.”
2024-12-09 10:00:48 +0000 UTC
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What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot.
2024-12-09 09:00:52 +0000 UTC
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2024-12-09 08:51:06 +0000 UTC
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What’s E.T. short for?
He’s only got little legs
2024-12-09 08:01:03 +0000 UTC
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Two men meet on opposites sides of a river. One shouts to the other “I need you to help me to get to the other side!”
The other guy shouts, “You are on the other side!”
2024-12-09 07:01:06 +0000 UTC
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What came first, the chicken or the egg?
Safety. Safety always comes first.
2024-12-09 06:01:10 +0000 UTC
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This is your captain speaking.
AND THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN SHOUTING.
2024-12-09 05:01:19 +0000 UTC
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A coroner died.
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2024-12-09 04:01:02 +0000 UTC
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2024-12-08 20:45:04 +0000 UTC
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2024-12-08 16:54:59 +0000 UTC
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2024-12-08 14:32:04 +0000 UTC
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How do you get a squirrel to like you?
Act like a nut.
2024-12-08 14:06:50 +0000 UTC
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Which rock group has four guys who can’t sing or play instruments?
Mount Rushmore.
2024-12-08 12:30:32 +0000 UTC
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I bought a dog from a locksmith.
The second I got him in the house he made a bolt for the door.
2024-12-08 11:30:28 +0000 UTC
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What do you call an empty can of Cheese Whiz?
Cheese Was.
2024-12-08 10:17:38 +0000 UTC
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What kind of dogs love car racing?
Lap dogs.
2024-12-08 03:00:59 +0000 UTC
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Library patron: Do you sell any books on paranoia?
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2024-12-08 02:01:02 +0000 UTC
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2024-12-08 01:22:39 +0000 UTC
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Why do you tell actors to break a leg?
Every play has a cast.
2024-12-08 01:01:12 +0000 UTC
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What do you call an empty can of Cheese Whiz?
Cheese Was.
2024-12-08 00:01:17 +0000 UTC
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2024-12-07 20:03:05 +0000 UTC
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Library patron: Do you sell any books on paranoia?
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2024-12-07 20:01:12 +0000 UTC
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